I keep getting comments about how awesome and funny my blog it.
Thanks.
However, I realized recently I haven't posted in a long time any funny stories that have happened to me. It has been tough because I don't go out as much as I used to in University and I haven't really gone on any dates in a while. Hence, the lack of funny stories.
In any case I decided to scramble through my memory and post a few past stories I still have up my sleeve. Originally I was trying to do it in chronological order but I can't be bothered anymore, so now it's on a first remembered basis.
Enjoy.
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One of the most bizarre nights I had with Wendy had to of been back in the summer of 2007 (yikes! it's been that long ago?!).
It was a nice summer day and we decided to check out the annual Jazz festival that was going on downtown. I don't know how I convinced her but I managed to get Wendy to let me park my car by a metro and take the metro downtown instead of driving all the way.
Wendy was weird in that way. She never would want to go anywhere without a car. Either I had to borrow my dads car and pick her up or she'd pick me up in her car but we'd never just meet downtown and have fun. That's why it was rare we ever went out and got drunk together.
Well, anyways, we were downtown with no car having a good time. I remember this well because it was the first time we held hands... This was in July and we started dating in February. Yes, it took me 5 months to muster up the courage to hold her hand. But hey, it's not like she took the initiative either!
Earlier that day my friend Slymm called me to ask what I was up to and told me that him and another friend would be downtown going to a bar to meet up with even more people. So, after checking out the free concerts for a while, we decided to go to that bar and meet up with the other folks.
This was the first time Slymm and my other friend met Wendy and when Wendy went to the bathroom, they both told me how impressed and happy they were that I was dating Wendy.
I couldn't drink that much because I was driving but the booze started flowing and everyone was getting ripped (damn you Wendy for always needing a car! Learn how to take the bus!) and the coolest thing happened - Wendy challenged Slymm to a drinking contest and blew him under the table. This was a hilarious thing to watch because she is 5'0" and 90 pounds.
It started getting late and we had to leave to catch the metro to get to my car so I could drive her home.
We get to the metro and all is good until Wendy complains she has to go to the bathroom and can't hold it in any longer. Now the metro ride from downtown to the car was at least 25 - 30 minutes and we still had ways to go until the car.
I asked her to wait but she said she couldn't and I was getting worried because it was late and I wasn't sure if we left the metro we'd be able to get back on another car. I wasn't sure if we were on the last car or if the was another one after this.
Quick thinking, I realized we were coming up to a spot where I knew there was a bar 5 minutes from the station. Thankfully I was introduced to this bar the week before or I never would have known about it.
We get off at the right stop, exit the station and run to the bar. This bar was a really tiny Irish bar that had just opened and really didn't have any clientele.
Inside there was only one table with about 6 people, the owner at the bar and someone singing karaoke.
Great.
So much for being inconspicuous about going in only to use the bathroom. So while Wendy was in the toilet I had to stand there pretending like I was ready to order a drink. Then, one of the people at the table noticed me twiddling my thumbs and started yelling at me to pick a song and go sing something.
So I ended up being told to sing Macho Man by the Village People. not one looking for trouble, I complied and next I know it I'm on stage singing my heart out.
Meanwhile, Wendy is in the bathroom doing her business and all of a sudden hears a familiar voice singing and is like "Wtf? is that... Elwood?" (she told me her reaction afterwards).
She came out while I was still singing.
I finished my song, got a bunch of woos and cheers from the one table in the bar, grabbed Wendy and we bolted back to the metro.
Thankfully we made it in time and caught the last metro.
I can't remember if the next thing actually happened the same night but lets pretend it did because it only adds to the story:
I drive her back home to her part of the city and pull up to her house. In the car we started making out hardcore until she ends up breaking the cup holder in the middle of my dad's car with her ass! She twisted to jump on me and in doing so cause the cup holder to make a snap sound.
We then said our goodbyes (i.e. more making out) and she went inside.
Definitely one of the more exciting moments I had in that relationship (there weren't that many).
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