Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Is what it is

Sunday I started feeling sick. Now i have some sort of cold. I hate it because I'm not technically sick sick but I'm not feeling 100% healthy either. It's like I'm 50% sick.
My throat was sore but it went away. Now my my nose is partially blocked but I'm pretty sleepy and week.

Anyways, because of this, I went to bed early Sunday night. All weekend I didn't hear from Wendy and was wondering if that could mean something. Lo and behold, Monday morning I notice she called but because I was so tired I slept right through it.

I called her back last night. It felt good to hear her say that she called me late because she was got really caught up in her book but also really wanted to talk to me so she just ended up calling me later than usual. I know it's silly but it's things like that that make me feel nice inside. She didn't have to call me but she wanted to and did.

We talked a bit and she felt bad to hear I was sick. For obvious reasons, this time she won't be coming over to make me feel better but talking on te phone was nice enough.

I took a chance and mentioned to her the small get together at my friend's cottage this weekend and asked if she wanted to come. I told her I know it may be too soon but I just want to hang out and it would be a lot of fun.

She seemed pretty reluctant about it and told me she's "think about it". 99.99% she's not going to come but I don't blame her. She's trying to figure things out and I keep pushing (not intentionally). I can see how she could think I was pushing with this but I also asked just to see where we stand. If she had said yes right away then at least I would know how comfortable she feels. Since she said no, to me that means she's still figuring things out an dI respect her choice.

I'll see what happens by Saturday but maybe in the end it's better she doesn't come because I know myself better than anyone and I may start to get ideas in my head that aren't true.

Until then...

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