I found it extremely freaky how on many occasions it felt like Wendy could read my mind. I'd be able to make a corny joke and she'd beat me to it. I'd have a plan on what I wanted to do and she'd agree with me before I'd even mention what I wanted to do next.
Once I heard a song and told her I couldn't remember the name of the group. Twenty minutes later, as we're walking, I was staring into space, not saying a word and she turns to me and says "Stop trying to remember the name of the group!".
Now, in an extremely supernatural way, she's done it again without even knowing it.
Just yesterday I was commenting on how I received an open invite by her via Facebook for her birthday.
I pegged it down to her knowing I would come under better circumstances and inviting me anyways to le me know I'm welcomed to come even though I most likely will not.
Turns out I was right.
She sent me an e-mail this evening basically making it clear that didn't invite me to be polite, but that she genuinely would like it for me to come. She assured that she meant it when she said she hopes we can remain friends, that I was a huge part of her life in the past year and that it's also okay if I choose not to come.
Like I said, freaky!
Maybe she reads this blog? Or she hacks into my computer? Or she can really read my mind!
In any case, I still have decided not to go. If I show up, no matter what, we'll just screw each other up badly. Ex's + Parties + Alcohol = Bad News (and sometimes babies).
I think she'll have a better birthday without me being there.
Now my dilemma is:
1. Do I reply to her e-mail to let her know I agree with her but still will not be coming or
2. Just ignore it to not break the silence
I'm veering more towards 1 because it sounds more like the right thing to do. That was she knows i still care for her but just need time and not come across as a jerk. However, I'm afraid if I do that then she may think I"m ready to "be friends" all of a sudden, which I'm not. I think I need to meet a few new people before I start hanging out with Wendy again.
What do you guys think?
Come on now, don't all shout at once!
2 comments:
I completely agree with altijdprijs.
When people tell me they remained friends with their exes, I never trust it. It is impossible. There are no exceptions. There will always, ALWAYS be one person in that "friendship" who is getting hurt.
If you want to respond, you can. But you will be responding to make HER feel better.. to make her feel like you're not angry at her. It will not help you. If you respond to her emails when she sends them, she will think everything's cool and will start treating you like a friend and it will make you feel weak and controlled.
I've been there. No matter how many times I told ExBF not to call, he called... months later, he would call.. and I would pick up... I'd tell him not to call.. and he wouldn't... I'd start feeling better.. then months later, sure and behold... he'd call again. It made it impossible to move on. I finally just had to stop answering my phone.
Not that this is your situation (yet)... it's just a warning.
I might reply, but tersely. Like:
"Thanks. I'm not planning on attending."
She's not respecting your request for distance, imo.
Oh... and carry a condom with you, dude. You'd hate to miss a good opportunity.
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