Wake Up Call

Yesterday, for reasons beyond explanation, I really wanted to call Wendy.

Maybe it was because I was tired and things were slow at work, but all day I kept thinking "wow I can't wait to call Wendy tonight".

It killed me.

Regardless of the fact that we broke up, I just hate feeling defendant on someone. After feeling that all day I started to get the feeling that when I did call her it wouldn't fulfill whatever void I was feeling that day [Note: I'm talking a general sense. I just felt like talking to her about anything, not necessarily about us or our situation].

Before bed, I finally called her.

The first half of the conversation was actually not too bad. Talked about a bunch of stuff and both sounded genuinely into it.

Then I got totally thrown off guard.

Wendy started to tell me about how she went to a rock show with her Guy Friend and how her other friend, Facebook Friend was telling her the other day that she should totally go after Guy Friend. She kept going on about it and saying all these things.

I just froze.

Here I am in bed, talking to my ex-girlfried/friend/limbo girlfiend (I don't know what she is anymore - she hasn't told me her thoughts on the matter...) like we always did, and now she's telling me about going after other guys.

I felt so stupid.

I thought to myself "Wow...I ended up exactly where I didn't want to end up!". That place where I still like her, thinking everything will go back to normal. Meanwhile, she has different thoughts on the horizon.

Well....
turns out I really am stupid.

Turns out I just misunderstood the whole thing. Facebook friend wasn't trying to hook Wendy and Guy Friend together, Facebook Friend wanted to hook up with Guy Friend (and it turns out Guy Friend has a girlfriend...).

Wendy said "Why would i be telling you this?".

I felt a lot better but it was a wake up call. It's made me realize that although things feel right, there is still this small issue of "whats going on" that needs to be addressed soon.

I've seen other friends do the pretend boyfriend/girlfriend thing (one such friend thought if he kept kissing his ex on the cheek instead of the lips, then none of us would think they were still going out...) and in the end someone gets hurt.

Maybe I'm over reacting but I just need to keep a head on my shoulders so I don't get hurt.